A Letter to High School Boys about Girls

Dear High School Boys,

Now fellows;

You see those fine ‘chics’ in your class, the ones everyone wants but reject you all and date prefects and basketballers from upper classes? Yes, the ones whose names you just silently cursed in your heart, do not worry about them, the future of hotness has different plans.

The ones you should worry about, the ones that should give you sleepless nights my brothers, are the rest of the girls that look normal now. Not all of them still, just the ones that have what Radio and Weasel called “POTENTIAL.”

These girls grow up and become fire! I am talking iron melting – would make HELL look like winter sort of fire! Do not despise them now for their bald heads, small breasts, flat behinds and parallel sides where the hips are supposed to be. The future for them is bright both “behind, front and even sideways.”

You see, contrary to what science and your biology teacher says, girls don’t hit the peak of adolescence while in High school. Well, hormone-wise they probably do, but body-wise, hotness-wise, they do not.

All the magic of curves, booty, slim waists and incredibly cute faces (although makeup is partly responsible for this for some)… anyway, all the magic happens at the university.


Something like this

When the freedom kicks in, the salon lady gets business, the body hugging dresses lead every outing, twerking becomes the new ‘stand at ease’ for the national anthem – which will be the hottest club banger then, some accents change (still don’t know why) and weight finally starts showing up and disappearing in all the right places; that’s when you my friends; that’s when you will see confused excitement in your worlds.

Now-a-days whenever I bump into some old girls that were never goddesses, for the minutes we stop to chat, I am standing on Holy Ground.

So fellows, be patient, these girls will turn into beautiful women and that’s when you are allowed to be ‘detoothed’ and friend-zoned accordingly. As their value goes up, so do their standards and so does the competition. (Emoji in sunglasses)

Your friend and potential future unfair competition,


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